Friday, March 4, 2011

Midlife Challenge

Battle Cruiser Pilot Midlife Challenge
A man walks down the street,
he says why am I soft in the middle now?
Why am I soft in the middle?
The rest of my life is so hard.
Paul Simon, You Can Call Me Al
There's a time in every low sec pilot's live when he starts thinking, maybe while he's waiting in front of hebrew school to pick up the kids, sitting behind the controls of a comfortable and reasonable, lets say, T1 battle cruiser, pondering and waiting, looking at girl's butts passing by that are like half his age he wonders why his own buttocks aren't as spectacular as they used to be and he remembers having a hard time getting some weird greasy stuff out of his belly button when he showered in the morning. And what's the deal with all that hair growing in strange places? There's a certain time in every low sec pilot's live he decides it may be time to play with the character creator again to build a new breast enhanced alt and maybe buy a shiny faction frigate convertible and get away from all this stuff, live a little, try something new, something different from the old pew here, pew there. Maybe strutting around high sec, why not? Maybe run some missions.

For me, my friends, that moment was last friday, 6-ish. I lit a cigarette and let it pass. Then finally the kids showed up.

3 comments:

  1. I just think it's awesome you have a tag for "buttocks" related posts.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm cool with the extra hair.
    And the flappy buttocks.
    Especially with the faction frig convertible.
    But oh my god, not missions!

    Call me yo 1-800-GET-HELP !

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dude, I hit a crisis.

    After my Navy Slicer exploded, like my first one ever, my buttocks seem more flappy than the day before. That was the shiny faction frigate convertible you suggested. At least I lost it to _the_ Otto Jarvis in a Vigilant.

    My hair now hangs down in curls and not even Shock Wave Mess Constructor Mousse can get it into shape. I need new stuff. More freedom. Better combat mousse.

    I've decided to go flashy.

    ReplyDelete