Friday, February 18, 2011

The Big Mousse Nerf

George: I like flowing, cascading hair. Thick lustrous hair is very important to me.
Jerry: 'Thick lustrous hair is very important to me', is that what you said?
Seinfeld
Mousse prices are through the roof!
Are alliances stocking up for future conflicts?
This is the last straw CCP! While the new character creator and the Incursion PvE content were all over the blogs and forums there's been significant changes in game mechanics nobody seems to have noticed. And once again it's one of the honest PvP pilot's favorite tools that has been nerfed to uselessness during the last update.

Out of Bed had been my favorite hair goo for years now. It gave me the confidence and protection I needed to impress the chicks at the office and look good during all kinds of sticky combat situations. Now CCP has once again messed with the sensitive balance in the ecosystem without understanding the macro level outcomes!

Epic Mousse Fail
Last week I took off my helmet after a non stop 42 hour roam and I noticed I wasn't wearing the usual impressive crown of plush, but a greasy bathing cap made of hair. Even worse, I was very much looking like Miura Bull if he had been spanked hard after a hot date with a babe which ... I lost my train of thought. (Needless to say I failed to score that evening in the Reggae Lounge.)

After a few hours of research I discovered the formula for plushiness, durability and glitter had been changed. Why isn't this in the change logs? Why was there no prior discussion about this? What's the CSM's role in this wicked game of checkers?

Before you all ragequit, there's hope: Fortunately I found another mousse (Shock Wave Mess Constructor) that is able to satisfy my needs almost as good as Out of Bed did before the nerf. Also it comes in a red can which fits my security status way batter than baby blue!

4 comments:

  1. The next generation combat mousse for small gang and solo pvp? Jesus bro, sign me up for a can!

    Leave some in the shop for others too and don't stockpile, not like Goonswarm who buy in bulk out of panic before and after every minor patch. There is no reason to panic about your hair. Where there is demand, there is availability on the market. If you overdo you hair you'll soon look like this anyway, so fly careful: http://goo.gl/OHsrU

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  2. Haha, awesome mate. The Reggae Lounge is where it is at mon . . . also, do you use the Pator Tech Student Issue Moustache Wax or something more . . . exotic? :)

    MB.

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  3. Very funny - great post.

    I myself favor a close cropped combat haircut. Makes washing out the clone vat fluids after one of my frequent poddings so much easier :)

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