Dealing with Customer Complaints

Well I'm no expert in the ransoming business. Most pods I can snag are young chars without expensive bling bling hardwired into in their brains. I 'm trying to ransom before podding nevertheless, but sometimes a system is busy with lots of criminals which could warp in any time or [raises voice] a Dramiel is already burning towards me. In those cases I just shoot the pod.

Residence in Egghelende VII - Moon 22.
Try the Steakhouse!

So I'm sitting in my Egghelende cabin the other day, reviewing recent combat logs with my intern Ms Lebowski when an angry customer transmission comes in:

Customer > you kill me yesterday
Customer > and you destroy my implantats
Customer > give me 50.000.000 milion on new byu for me and i dodnt kill you . ok ?
Sobczynski > did i ask you for ransom?

I skipped through the logs and found what I had suspected: I had not ransomed that guy. Trying to figure out the damage I had done, it turns out he had all slots filled with something. I then resorted to the final step of every B2C interaction:

Sobczynski > Hmm, usually: No refunds.
Customer > yes you destroy me yesterday and new clone all my implantats lost
Sobczynski > It seems I forgot to ransom you yesterday. So it's my fault indeed.
Customer > ok i find you
Sobczynski > Ok, I'm in Amamake at the moment. I'll be in in Vard, Auga, Siseide or Egghelende later. You can find me there.
Customer > ok thanks good fly
Sobczynski > pleasure talking to you.

Phew. For a minute there I thought he might file a complaint at my corps issue tracker!

I'll attach another example of a successful transaction, this time with a very nice and funny young pilot. You see the classic steps of a successful ransom applied (I have highlighted the the key phrases).

#1 Friendly Greeting and a GF

Sobczynski > hi there
Sobczynski > gf!
Customer > no :(
Customer > you kicked my butt

#2 Establishing a cordial atmosphere for the negotiations

Sobczynski > i have an range fit, bad luck mate
Customer> oh i see

#3 Ransom Offer

Sobczynski > 5 million for your pod?
Customer > i have never been held at ransom
Customer > where is my knight in shining armor?

#4 Guiding the customer through the process

Sobczynski > no sweat, i'll guide you through the process
Sobczynski > ok, you pay and you wont get podded
Customer > i see
Customer > ok how
Sobczynski > normally theres a time limit :)
Sobczynski > right click my name-> give money

#5 Completing the transaction

Customer > there ya go
Sobczynski > thanks mate.
Sobczynski > pleasure doing business with you